Self-Condemnation

What I’ve learned is that even our thought patterns are habitual. We think a certain way for so long and our brains form neural pathways that keep getting tracked over.

I’ve become aware of how often I condemn myself.  I’ll forget something and I’ll beat myself up over it.  I’ll make a decision then lament it was the wrong one.  I’ll use phrases like “That’s what I get for _____!” Or “What do I know?!”

What I’ve realized is that every time I do this, I’m sending a signal that I’m wrong, can’t trust myself and it eats away at my confidence. 

Now every time I catch myself thinking or saying one of these self-condemning things, I stop and say NOPE!  Then I say a positive affirmation instead and encourage myself.

It’s wild how much it happens but I realize that it is habitual, a subconscious program. And every time I stop it in its tracks, I’m laying down a new pathway for a new automatic program.  

It takes a lot of presence and awareness but I’m grateful for the opportunities to rewrite this old way of being.

What are ways you condemn yourself consciously or unconsciously?  Take a look at how you’re speaking to yourself and about yourself.  Try rewriting it with something more affirmative - it will take you much further. 

XO

Adrienne

PS...Want to learn how to raise your level of conscious awareness to start writing more productive programs in your mind?  Join my Alchemy course starting in a few weeks!  Read about it here or schedule a call with me to see if it’s a good fit! 

Blocking the Flow

The mind is constantly judging things in life as either good or bad.  We go through great lengths seeking out the good and avoiding the bad.

Every situation in life is actually neutral.  It’s just our thoughts about it that make it either good or bad.

When we label something as bad or we don’t like it, we create resistance.  When resistance shows up, we are unintentionally blocking the flow of life.  

Just as any resistance in a wire blocks the flow of the electrical current passing through.  

The thing is every situation we deem as “bad” could have an opportunity or gift in it.  But if we are resistance to it, the good can’t come in.

The invitation is to understand that nothing is happening on accident and everything in life is happening FOR you.  Even if you can’t see it in the moment.

When you understand that, it is easier to stay in a positive state even when challenges arise knowing they are serving you in some way.

Then in that positive state you can allow the gifts to come through.

XO

Adrienne

PS...Join me Wednesday at 2:30 MST | 4:30 EST for my next Conscious Conversation where I will be sharing all about the Law of Attraction and how to harness it to bring more things you desire into your life!

Redirection

I believe we can change our minds in any moment.  In fact, that is true freedom.  Waking up every morning and making sure that everything we’re doing is still in alignment with our highest truth and bringing us joy.  And if it’s not, then we can redirect.

While I believe this in my heart, I still see how my ego can get in the way.  It will have excuses like “But what will everyone think?”  “It’s too late to do something like that.”  “If I quit this, that means I will have failed.”

All of those excuses are just stories.  Stories that keep me trapped and not free.  

I understand the ego is just trying to do its job and keep me safe.  But it can really get in the way if I listen to it.  I am changing, expanding and evolving so much recently that things I wanted and were bringing me joy just a year ago, no longer are.  And that’s ok.  I am free to change my direction any time I want without having to explain myself.

This is ultimate freedom.

Where do you allow your ego’s stories to keep you safely where you are?  Notice it and choose freedom instead.  The only person that is judging you, is yourself.

XO

Adrienne

Grass is Always Greener

When I was little, I really wanted curly hair.  I prayed for it and even went as far as eating my most detested food (tomatoes at the time) because a relative told me that if I ate them, it would make my hair curly.

As an adult, my hair got super curly.  And I spent years straightening it every time I washed it and getting treatments to keep it straight.  About a year ago I decided to just embrace my natural curls and gave up on straightening it all the time.

I sent the below picture to my sister last week while I was in some hot and humid weather irritated that it was making my hair even bigger than normal.  

The next day while at the gym, a girl came up to me and said “You have the prettiest hair, I wish I had curly hair like yours!”

It made me think about all the wishing and hoping I had done wanting my hair curly and now how much I long for straight, smooth hair.  The grass is always greener.  We always want what we don’t have.

What if we started changing our perspective - wanting what we DO have.  Because if we want everything we have then we have everything we want.  

Remember that everything you have now was once a wish that you longed for.  Come back to being grateful for it all.

XO

Adrienne

Questions

I believe that life is formed by the quality of the questions we ask ourselves.  I see how my insatiable curiosity has opened up doors for me and as I ask bigger and bigger questions, I receive more and more answers.

I also see when I ask limited or small questions, I stay stuck in the same place.  Things like:

“Why does this always happen to me?”
“What’s wrong with me?”
“What's wrong with the world?!"

Ask and it will be given; seek and you shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you.

When we ask, whatever question positive or negative, we will receive an answer.  So why don’t we start asking better questions and in that, we will start seeing better and better answers.

Questions such as:

“Why are things always working out for me?!”
“Why am I so lucky?!”
“Why do I always meet the most interesting people?!”

I invite you to start noticing what questions you are saying to yourself.  Catch yourself and reframe them to more positive, empowering questions and watch better answers and experiences enter your life.

XO

Adrienne

Intention + Attention

I believe our life is formed by our intentions and our attention.  

What do I mean by this?  

Well intention means an aim or a plan.  For every action we take, there is always an intention.  But if we’re not consciously choosing our intention, it’s being chosen for us.

When we act with intention, it means we are consciously aligning our thoughts, words and actions with our desired outcome.  

Then, attention is our focused awareness.  Whatever we place our attention on in our lives grows stronger.  Whatever we take our attention away from will wither and disappear.  

If we’re placing our attention on all the things that are wrong with the world and our lives, we will just bring more of that into focus.  If we start placing our attention on that which will help us achieve our intention, we will start to see opportunities and possibilities.

I invite you to start setting intentions.  It doesn’t have to be some big, grand thing.  You can start small with your week, your day, your morning.  Such as “I intend to see the good in myself, others and the world.”  Or “I intend to provide value to everyone I see this week.”  Or “I intend to bring awareness to my subconscious behaviors.”

Then start placing your attention on that.

Intention + Attention = Transformation 

When we keep our mind focused, our vision clear and our heart open, you will be amazed by what can happen in your life.

My intention for the week is to be present, be a channel of pure love and BE the version of me who is running an eight figure business.  I’d love to hear what your intention is - write it to me to make it official and lock it into your mind!

XO

Adrienne

PS…Don’t forget to join me Wednesday at 12:00 MST | 2:00 EST for my inaugural Conscious Conversations!  I will be discussing how to uncover your soul’s desires and the difference between motivation and inspiration.  You won’t want to miss it!

Mind is Resistance

Our mind creates resistance to what is.  Resistance comes in when our mind starts thinking “this shouldn’t be happening” or some other commentary that is arguing with reality.

Without resistance, everything could flow much more easily and effortlessly.  If a tree had a mind, it would stunt its growth.  It would start thinking: Why am I not growing fast enough?  Why does that tree have more leaves than me?  Why am I growing at an angle?  Why is this or that happening?

And it would literally stunt its growth.  It would not be able to blossom into the full tree it was supposed to be because it had preconceived ideas about how it thought it should go.  But a tree does not do that obviously and can bloom into its fullest expression.

When we resist what is happening in life, it prevents us from growing into who we’re meant to be.

If there is something you are going through, see how your mind is creating resistance to it and how you argue with what is.  You don’t know where the flow of life is taking you.  And it could be somewhere magnificent!

Maybe you have to go through some challenges or rough patches because there is actually a short cut to get you to everything you’ve ever wanted and more.  But when your mind comes in and resists, it stops the whole process.  

Watch your mind in these moments.  Don’t get pulled into the commentary.  Take three conscious breaths and come into the present moment.  Tell your mind you are safe and that everything is working out exactly as it should be. 

XO

Adrienne

Ego

Wayne Dyer says ego is Edging God Out.  I like that but I also don’t like to make the ego into an enemy.

In my opinion, the ego is a lens we wear over consciousness that helps give us an individualized experience.  It’s our personality, our character.  Without it, there would be no individuation.

But we do have to learn the tactics of the ego that cause us to suffer.  You see, the ego believes we are separate - separate from others, from God, from our desires.   It strengthens this separate self by making others wrong - it judges, it complains, it creates enemies. 

When we believe this commentary of the egoic mind, we suffer.  This is where we have to pay attention.  We don’t need to believe these thoughts the ego is having us think.  We can remember that we all are part of one source, one infinite sea of consciousness.  When we hear those complaints, judgements or enemies pop up in our head, we can just ignore what it says.

This is the key to freedom - not believing all your thoughts.  The ego has us believe we are our mind - that we are the constant dialogue going on in our heads.  But the moment we create some space and realize that is not who we are, we don’t have to get tangled up into the drama of the ego.

My ego loves to complain and throws a lot of fits about the way it thinks things should be.  I just watch with loving compassion like a calm mother watching a child throw a tantrum.  I don’t react, I just let it be.

Watch how your ego deludes you.  Watch how it is always making things into an enemy.  Because if there is no other, that is death to the ego.  Don’t try to stop it, just watch in curiosity and don’t let it whisk you away into a sea of drama and negative emotions.

If you do this, you will see that there is ever-present peace underneath the noise of the ego.

XO

Adrienne

Warren’s Wisdom

After I left the finance industry, I quickly realized I made the right decision when I never turned on CNBC again.

Although I do still have a passion for investing, businesses, making money etc. 

When I found out I was going to be in Omaha during the Berkshire Hathaway annual investor conference, I decided I had to go.

Especially since the firm I was at for ten years, First Eagle, followed Warren Buffett’s investing style and I spoke about him all the time. 

Getting to hear from the famed investor exceeded my expectations. Of course it was interesting hearing from him about the companies they’re invested in but what was even more interesting was some of the life advice he gave.

Here were some of my favorite nuggets:

💡There’s a great advantage in not knowing when you’re going to die.  Live everyday as if it were your last.

💡Spend your days doing things you enjoy.  If you’re lucky, you find your interests when you’re young. But if you don’t, you keep looking until you do. It’s never too late. 

💡Think about how you want your obituary to read and start living life that way now.

💡Surround yourself with people you trust. When you find those people, cherish them and forget about the rest. 

💡Find the person you want to share your life with and marry someone that will help you reach your vision.  Sometimes you find them early and sometimes you make mistakes along the way. 

💡The opportunities today, especially in the US, are endless. Go after what you want.

What a cool experience this was for me and even cooler to hear him preaching about life advice (especially being similar to what I share!)  This was an unforgettable experience and I’m so grateful for the opportunity.

If you find yourself in Omaha for this annual event, I’d highly recommend buying some BH shares and checking it out.

XO

Adrienne

PS...Want to find a like minded community you trust, uncover your passions and learn to design your life the way you want it to be?  Join me for my next round of Alchemy. Reply to this email to get on the waitlist!

Protection

I was having a conversation recently about all the ways we protect ourselves in life and what it actually does.

I equated it to walking around with a big plastic bubble around us - we think somehow this bubble is protecting us when in fact it is actually just keeping us from experiencing life to its fullest!

I notice how this comes up for me - I don’t share certain information because I don’t want to be seen as weak.  I don’t express my needs for fear of being “needy.”  And if I look closely, a multitude of other ways.

All these protection mechanisms are not actually doing me any good!  What I’ve realized is that we can only love to the depth we can grieve.  We can only experience joy to the degree we can feel sadness. 

If we’re constantly protecting ourselves from so-called negative experiences, we’re actually dulling our capacity for the highs of life too!

The word protect comes from a Latin word that means “covered in front.”  If we keep ourselves covered, it only ends up creating a prison for ourselves.  Overwhelm and loneliness ensue when we keep things out with this protection.

I believe the antidote to protection is self-trust.  When we can completely trust ourselves that we will be OK no matter what happens, then we can allow ourselves to be raw, vulnerable and open to anything.  

We can let people in completely, seeing all parts of us and not run from any experience because we know that we can handle it.  

Notice the ways you protect yourself and try giving it up.  I promise you will be ok.

XO

Adrienne

PS...So grateful for the amazing souls in my new group for Alchemy!  Reply to this email to get on the waitlist for the next round!

Grand Adventure

What if everyday you woke up excited, looking at life as a grand adventure?  Because in reality, that’s what it is!!!

This is how I see it: we came from the spirit world so incredibly eager and excited to have an experience as a human in Earth school.  We told ourselves we wouldn’t forget who we really are and our innate powers.

We knew it would be a grand adventure.  That nothing that happened could ever actually hurt us - it was all just for fun, for the experience of it!  And that there would be learning in it all.

This is the attitude we could be taking into life everyday.  Waking up excited and eager thinking “What’s gonna happen today?!”  

The problem is our mind and body are so conditioned to the past that we believe today is going to be just like yesterday.  We get addicted to emotions like guilt, anger and resentment.  Our mind plays a trick on us thinking that somehow the future is going to be better than this present moment which couldn’t be further from the truth.

It’s time to start looking at your life as the grand adventure that it is.  It’s a journey to nowhere - there isn’t an arrival!  So you might as well just sit back and enjoy the ride.

Today could be the best day of your life - wake up with eager anticipation for the grand adventure of a new day.  

XO

Adrienne

PS...want to learn to train your mind to be excited and inspired every single day?!  Come join Alchemy!  Last chance to get in before we start tomorrow.  Stop putting things off for the future - learn to live fully in this moment!

Victim or Victor?

I speak with a lot of people about their current life situation and my ears have been finely tuned to pick up on what the problem is going on in their lives.

So often I hear people blaming spouses, business partners, their firms, the market, their families for why they can’t be living the way they want.

I am guilty of this at times too. Blaming circumstances, situations or people for why things aren’t going my way.  Until I remember that the key to freedom is radical personal responsibility.

When we take radical personal responsibility, we take our power back.  We are no longer victims to our lives - we realize we are the creators and we can create whatever it is we want.

When something doesn’t go my way or I’m upset about a certain situation, I know that I somehow attracted that into my experience by being an energetic match to it.

I know the universe is bringing it to me to remind me to step into my own power and learn from it.

For example:

🤍If someone is rude or disrespectful to me, I look at the ways I am disrespectful to myself.  
🤍If prospects are being noncommittal, I see the ways in which I am being noncommittal.
🤍If a situation is very frustrating, I find where I still hold frustration and resentment inside.

And then I look to change that pattern within.  

The outside world is a mirror to our inner state.  And just like we wouldn't try to change the image on a mirror, we would change ourselves to see a different reflection, the universe works the same way.

I know this is a tough pill to swallow for a lot of people.  But when we can start taking radical personal responsibility, it is extremely empowering and liberating.

We will never get to where we want to go as long as we continue to blame the outside world for everything.  Start taking your power back and take responsibility for everything that happens in your life.

XO

Adrienne

PS...Want to learn how to change your energy to start attracting what you want?  Join my course ALCHEMY - where you will learn to get on the frequency with all your desires.  Book a call with me to see if it's a good fit.

Love

I’m really open about my life in these emails, on social media and with my clients. I believe it’s one of the best ways I can help people - to show the things I’m going through and have experienced and how it’s possible for others too.

Something I am not as open about is my love life.  Why?  I think it’s because there’s been a lot of shame about my past and failed relationships.  

For the last few years, I have been dedicated to understanding myself, seeing my patterns in relationships and making sure I am happy on my own instead of relying on someone else.

I spent a lot of time dreaming up what I wanted in a partnership in my life.

Anything that wasn’t that, I said no to.  I met some really great men along the way but they just weren’t what I wanted and needed in someone.

In the fall of last year I met someone unexpectedly and serendipitously.     

As much as I said I wanted a serious relationship, I see how my old patterns of walls and fleeing are still very much present.  This whole journey has been so healing for me in many ways. To allow someone to see all of me, and let the love in.  It’s not something I’ve really experienced before.

I’m learning to actually ask for what I need (instead of assuming someone knows) and then trust he will give that to me if he can.

This is a completely different dynamic than I’m used to where I would perpetually strategize and keep my cards close to my chest.  (Why did I think that would work?!)

I found myself nervous to send this email out thinking “what if we break up shortly after?!”

I recognize that’s still the scared little girl inside of me who is terrified of getting her heart broken.  But the more we let fear get in the way, the less we can experience the fullness of life!

I don’t know what the future holds for us living in different states but I have to keep reminding myself that I don’t need to figure it out.  I can stay present and enjoy the unfolding knowing that everything is always working out for my highest good.  And just enjoy the healing power of love along the way.

XO

Adrienne

PS...Want to create the vision for your dream relationship?  That's one of the first things we do in ALCHEMY - get super clear on what we want for our relationships and three other main areas of your life.  Then I show you how to bring it to life.  Book a call with me to see if it's a good fit.

Perception vs. Reality

I once heard that if we were to see through the eyes of someone else, it would seem like we were tripping.  Being in someone else’s mind, seeing things from their reality is an interesting concept.

I like to keep this in mind.  That reality never is as we believe it to be.  It’s just our perception of reality.  

The powerful thing about perception is that it can be changed at any time.  We can change our perception to view a situation in a different way.  

I like to use the concept of what I call the “big” me and “little” me.  You see little me thinks I’m just this little human battling the world and everything is happening to me. 

Big me understands that I am part of all that is. And that everything is divinely orchestrated for my highest good.  Even if it doesn’t seem like that at the time.

Perception is powerful and can help us become more compassionate.  The waiter is rude?  Maybe he just had a fight with his partner.  Driver cuts you off?  Maybe she reeeeally has to go to the bathroom.  Someone doesn’t get back to you?  Maybe they’re overwhelmed.

The point is, there is a big difference between reality and perception.  Remember this the next time you react.  And use the tool of perception to change how you view a situation. 

XO

Adrienne

PS...Want to learn how to develop your perception and five other mental facilities?  Check out my course ALCHEMY to become unf***withable!

Change Your Mind, Change Your Life

I was watching the Netflix docuseries Full Swing over the weekend.  There was an episode about Pro Golfer, Wyndham Clark, and how he hired a psychologist and performance coach to help get him out of a negative cycle.

It worked so well for him and in such a short amount of time, he went from being on the verge of leaving the tour to winning a major!!  Incredible!

We can get stuck in patterns of negativity and belittling ourselves.  And you may not know how destructive this can be to your life!

The way we talk to ourselves is SO important.  After doing this work for a while, I can tell when people are caught in this negativity and not speaking to themselves kindly - because it is happening with the words they speak:

“This is hard.” 
“I’ll shut up now.” 
“I’m not good at X.”
“I got screwed.”

These are just a few examples of things that I hear.  I know if this little bit is slipping out, there must be even more negativity going on inside.

I understand this because I deal with this ALL the time!  That voice in my head can be brutal!  It’s constantly comparing, criticizing, judging, complaining - all the things.  

I’ve said this many times before but I believe your pain is your purpose.  My pain is that voice in my head which is now why I help others get it in check because I know how disempowering it can be.

We don't always have a choice in the thoughts we think.  But we do have a choice if we want to believe it.

Changing your mind CAN change your life and help you accomplish things you thought were once impossible.

Whether you're a pro athlete, or just someone with big goals, you can’t do it alone.  Whether it’s with me, a psychologist, another coach, whatever - if you want more from life, find someone to help you accomplish it.

XO

Adrienne

Stories

We tell stories a lot - stories of our past, what happened to us, stories of why we can’t live the way we want or why we are the way we are.

What is a story?  It’s a made up account of your life.  I say made up because it’s just your perspective on it.  

I’ve been noticing in meditation how at times a feeling will start bubbling up and my mind immediately attaches a story to it of why I feel that way.

That’s the job of the left brain, the analytical mind - to create a story.  What I’m realizing is that story may not have anything to do with the current feeling but the mind is trying to make sense of it.

If I catch it and let go of the story, I can just go into the sensation in my body and feel the feeling without judging it or getting stuck in the story.

The story is what keeps us stuck in the feeling.  If we just go into the emotion, the raw feeling of it and let it pass through us, it doesn’t take long for it to dissipate.  

If and when I find myself getting stuck in a story, I remind myself that there is always a higher perspective.  That maybe from my little point of view it seems harsh, but from the soul level, everything is perfectly orchestrated.  Even if it doesn’t seem like it to little ol’ human me.

Catch yourself when you are replaying stories of your past that don't feel good or creating new ones as an excuse in your life now.  Let the story go and just be present.

XO

Adrienne

Two Operating Systems

A big thing I have learned on my path is that we have two operating systems within us.

The first is that of the mind.  When we live our lives from our mind, this is where programs of lack, limitation and separation are.  It’s where all the fear is.  Living from the mind keeps us small, keeps us stuck in situations we don’t love because of fear.  It keeps us from being all that we can be.

The other is the heart.  The heart is said to be the seat of the soul.  The heart has answers that the head doesn’t.  When we make decisions from our heart, they may not make logical sense, but they FEEL right.  

When we start living from the heart, we do things out of love and passion and we’re excited about life!  When we’re living from our minds, we’re in fear and probably living with stress and anxiety.  That excitement and joie de vivre isn’t there.    

It takes courage to live by the operating system of our heart.  In fact, the Latin root of the word courage is cor which means heart.

Because the answers from the heart aren’t logical, they don’t make sense to the mind.  The mind will come in with lots of reasons why that shouldn’t be an option or why it won’t work.  

What the mind doesn’t understand is when you start making decisions from the heart, you’re so much more supported.  It’s not just you against the world - the universe has your back!  You start to flow downstream with life and things become easier.  

This is a process and one I am still learning how to do.  But the more I do, the more I am amazed by synchronicities and things I couldn’t have imagined!

A great practice is to pause and take three conscious breaths while focusing your attention on your heart and then ask your question.  I can guarantee your heart has been waiting for you to listen.  Try it.

XO

Adrienne

Walls

As I continue on my path of self-discovery, I’ve learned how many walls I have put up around myself.

I believe we build these walls after heartbreaks, disappointments and other life experiences that cause us to want to protect ourselves from getting hurt.

What I’ve come to learn is the more we protect ourselves with these mind-made walls, the duller our life experiences become.  

You can only love to the capacity you are able to grieve.  You can only find joy to the capacity that you are able to experience sadness.  It’s only when we fully embrace our failures that we can appreciate our success.

I’ve committed myself to notice and integrate anything that keeps me from living with a fully open heart.  It hasn’t been an easy process. I see how I use things like judgement, criticism and worry to keep me from experiencing the fullness of life.

Now that I’m aware, I am able to catch myself in those unproductive thought loops.  I go inside and I nurture that part of me that is afraid and using those things as a defence mechanism.  

I’ve come a long way and believe that my life is blossoming in such a beautiful way because I am so much more open to living and experiencing fully without fear.  Trusting that I will be able to handle anything that life throws my way.

While this will be an ongoing journey for me to dismantle these walls, I know that all it takes is a lot of presence to notice when they creep back up.

Where are you building walls around yourself?  Can you begin trusting your heart has the capacity to weather any storm and let go of your walls?

XO

Adrienne

Awareness

I say this often, mostly because the stat is so staggering to me, but 95% of all of our behavior is subconscious.  We’re very rarely present and we’re very rarely reacting to a situation as it is because we’re mostly just replaying an old program from the past.

This is why raising our conscious awareness is so important because it’s the first step to change.  Once you’re aware of the program, you can deliberately make a different choice.  

As I’ve been on this path, I continue to raise my awareness and it’s not easy.

At times I’ve become so acutely aware of subconscious thoughts, programs and behaviors and how self-sabotaging they are, it almost makes me ill.

I start thinking to myself “What is the point of all of this?!  It’s easier to go back to being asleep and just numb myself.”  

But I know that’s not the answer either.  

It takes courage to look inside yourself.  It’s not always pretty but it’s about developing a ton of self-compassion and understanding that we’re always doing the best we can with what we know at the time.

Once we’re aware, once we know better, we can do better.  And even if we don't do better, that's ok too.

XO

Adrienne

Perfection

I consider myself to be a recovering perfectionist.  I can get very wrapped up in portraying perfection in looks, life etc.

Especially now that I am a coach this comes up a lot.  I feel like I have to be perfect, always do the right thing, have the most amazing life etc. in order to help others.

What I’ve learned though is how untrue that is.

I can have my own struggles and still help people.  I can be a mess and still help others through their mess.  I can screw up and still lead others to do their best.

In fact I feel being imperfect, having these experiences and sharing makes me an even better coach because I understand what my clients are going through and I can help them even more.

Who wants a perfect coach anyway?!  There’s no fun in that and probably will make you feel even worse about yourself.

I am here to say I am not perfect by any means.  Far from it.  But I always do my best and I am always learning and evolving so I can help others too.

Do you want any support in your life?!  Come chat with me.  I’ll tell you all my crazy mistakes, biggest fears and deepest struggles so you can know you’re not alone in whatever it is you’re going through 😊

XO

Adrienne